It’s no mystery–I think a lot about things. Back in July, while on vacation, I found myself spending (too much) time contemplating work. I don’t recommend that, folks, when you’re on vacation but, hey, things happen, right? Anyone who knows me personally knows I struggle with one of my jobs–the office job. I have the office job simply as a way to pay my bills as I build the work that brings me joy–Yoga and Reiki and all sorts of other good stuff. Being on vacation gave me the time to really pay attention to what that means–I have this job simply to pay my bills. How does that feel in my body? How does that feel in my brain? What does it do to my energy levels? How does it impact my moods?
The answers came quite easily. Working simply for money feels really heavy and sluggish in my body. I find myself filled with tension so my neck and back hurt even though I’m only sitting at a desk. My stomach is clenched. My heart races. My brain feels bored and less than agile. My energy? I don’t have any. I drag myself out of bed. I drag myself to the office, through the office, home from the office, and through the remainder of my day until I can rest in bed again. My moods? I’m a bitch, and if I’m not being a bitch then I’m generally melancholy.
Compare this to the one hour a week when I teach Yoga. No matter how my day has been or what I’m going through at the time, my body feels light, agile, calm and spacious. My innards are relaxed. Muscle tension eases up. My brain lets go of all it obsesses with and focuses on the needs and safety of my students. My energy lifts as we move through the hour so that any exhaustion I may have felt before walking into class has disappeared; I feel energized and vital. And my moods? Joyous. Uplifted. Hopeful. Awestruck.
I’ve heard a lot about this “right work versus wrong work”. So much of it sounds like new age mumbo jumbo to me but I think I’m starting to get the underlying vibe of what people are saying. When we invest our time and energy in “wrong work”, work that, like my office job, saps us of our vital life force and leaves us feeling drained and unfulfilled, we’ve essentially entered into a deal I like to call the Poisonous Paycheque, clever cousin to the Deal with the Devil. This is how the scenario looks to me:
You need money to pay the bills. Someone comes along and says, “I have a job for you. I know you won’t like it, just as you know you won’t like it, but it will pay your bills. But here’s the deal: I have in my hands a bottle of poison. I will give you 5 dollars every time you consume a tiny granule of what’s in here. You won’t feel anything at first. You’ll feel just fine so you’ll take granule after granule, and I will give you 5 dollars each time. But the poison will be building up in your system as the money builds up in your bank account. Soon you’ll start feeling ‘under the weather’. You won’t have as much energy. You’ll feel tired all the time. Your stomach will ache a bit and will begin to bloat. Your mind will feel hazy and you won’t feel like socializing as much any more. In time your moods will become erratic and your body will start to fail. Eventually you will die…having paid all your bills on time. Here’s your first granule. Would you like these 5 bucks?”
How much of your life are you willing to sacrifice for the poisonous 5 bucks, or the poisonous relationship, or the poisonous lifestyle or diet or anything else that you know darn well isn’t good for you, or is doing you in?
How…much…of…your…life…are…you…willing…to…sacrifice?
How much are you willing to sacrifice?
Namaste,
Tabitha
In Defence of Reiki
Posted in Commentary, Healing, Reiki, tagged heal your fear, in defence of Reiki, love, Reiki on March 15, 2012 | 4 Comments »
I’ve been wrestling with this for some time. Who the hell am I to defend something that does not need defending? Why bother? You won’t change any minds, Tabitha. All quite possibly true but I need to say something if for no other reason than to finally speak my piece. I’m pulling on the big boots cuz I’m gonna step into it up to my kneecaps.
“That woo woo shit doesn’t work for me.” “Oooooh…..that crystal cracking crap again.” Suspicion. Deeply held reservations. Downright bristling at the mere mention of the word “Reiki”. It breaks a good woman’s heart. Where does this all come from? Have the sceptics even tried Reiki before condemning it? It feels so……Burning Times.
There is some strongly held belief that in Reiki there is an unwelcome manipulation of energy, that the practitioner goes into you and twists, turns and tweaks the stuff you’ve got going on. There is a notion that we see into the dark corners of your being, that we know your secrets, that we look at things you don’t want anyone to know. I’m going to be up-front here–there are those who do these things in as much as there are doctors, psychiatrists, and dentists who violate the boundaries of their patients. But let us remember that for all of the bad apples we like to focus on there are many, if not MORE, of the “good guys” out there helping us with our bodies, minds and souls.
Like other practitioners, we Reiki people have a code of ethics. We do not approach without express permission of the person–this means if you don’t want me touching you, I AIN’T GONNA TOUCH YOU! That’s bad karma. That’s just plain good sense. That is respect for another human being’s boundaries. That is what I do. If you start feeling uncomfortable with the process, you have the right to say “no”, to halt the process, AND I WILL LISTEN. I do not discover things about you that you don’t want to share, and I certainly don’t go poking around for the goods, looking for your soft side. Folks, I’ve got enough of a job carrying my own shit around, I’m not going to pick yours up as well. And it’s just not polite to snoop around in people’s psychic medicine cabinets. If I find something out about you, it’s because you tell me. End of story. Yes, I have instinct. Yes, I have intuition. Yes, I suspect there are parts of your story that I see from time to time, but if you ain’t gonna tell me, I AIN’T GONNA PRY.
And if you come across a practitioner who does not adhere to all of these things——LEAVE! Plain and simple. It’s up to you.
There is a place in this world for the “softer” healing arts. There are things that happen in our lives that rest in the in-between places that cannot get accessed any other way. There are states of being like raw grief, depression and sheer exhaustion, that defy words–you cannot speak of them, they are indescribable states of being; therefore, talk therapy is not always helpful. And there are places that cannot be accessed through other body work, places that the kneading of massage, the piercing of acupuncture, and the pressing of reflexology just cannot reach. This is the place for Reiki.
Reiki is the magic touch of your mother who, when you were sick as a child, put her cool hand on your feverish forehead to soothe your suffering. Reiki is the deep hug of a beloved friend who just listened to the painfully hard day you had. Reiki is the silent presence of someone who knows you so well that she simply sits with you and lets you be when you’re in the throes of grief. Reiki is the kind stranger who quietly helps you with your dropped groceries, and touches you on the arm before she walks away. Reiki is a loving companioning, an acknowledgement of your existence, a willingness to travel with you through your pain. Reiki is a burden shared so that a pain may be lessened. Is that really so scary?
Is it the name that puts you off? “Reiki”. Maybe it’s too exotic. Would it help if we called it something else? “Mother Teresa’s Touch”? How about just plain old “Love”? Cuz that’s what it is in its purest form.
And maybe that’s what it all comes down to–our adult fear of love and the sense that we do not deserve to be loved. Our fear of being open and vulnerable and trusting and pure, like the wise, intuitive children we once were. And maybe that’s it, friends. Maybe the problem rests not in the practice and in those who offer it. Maybe the problems rests in our own hearts that have shut down to the natural things that are good in life. Maybe it’s our own scars that come from hard living that shut us down and make us suspicious before we even have cause. Maybe we’re just plain scared.
And that’s okay.
Maybe one day you’ll book a Reiki session and bring your fear along. You might just find out that the world isn’t as scary as you think it is, and that there are some superb people out there who really genuinely care about you.
You might just…set yourself free.
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